I shouldn’t be doing this. This is wrong. I’m just falling for it over again. I can’t let myself do this.

That’s all I kept thinking as I got up that glorious Friday morning. As I stepped into the warm water of the shower, I rested my head against the cool tile of the wall and took a deep breath. I was going to see my love, but it was so wrong. I hadn’t talked to him in months, and I was just falling back into the trap.

It started last night. He had called me just to chat. Things were normal. Well, as normal as things got with us. Of course we talked as if everything was normal, but underneath the ruse, we both knew what the other was thinking: I still love you. He made a snide joke and I pretended not to hear it.

“What was that?” I asked playfully.

“Oh, nothing.” he replied, because he knew it made me mad. I kept on prodding him for what seemed like forever, until finally I resorted to bribary.

“I promise to buy you some candy if you tell me.”

“Ooh! Candy!” he said jokingly. So he ended up telling me, and it ended up being something completely pointless. Nonetheless, I had promised. So we planned to walk up to the Quick Trip the next day so i could buy him some candy.

The next morning I got up excited, but uneasy. I quickly dressed and set out towards the front of my neighborhood. The day started out beautiful. Sunny and hot with not a cloud in the sky. When I reached the front of my neighborhood, he was waiting for me on his little bike. So we set out. We talked and laughed and played around. We ended up stopping in the Subway on the way and getting some sandwiches. We took turns taking pictures and just talking.

When we finally reached the Quick Trip, we went in and bought some Gummy Lifesavers, Life Water, and some Sour Gummy Worms. We sat on the curb outside the gas station and ate and talked.

On our way back to my house, it started to rain. I went inside to change out of my wet clothes and we stood on the porch and just talked. We both knew we were just stalling because we didn’t want to part.

Finally, he walked out to get his bike and go home. But right at that very moment, a down pour of rain broke out. We both just looked at eachother and knew. We walked toward each other in one motion. Out in the pouring rain with the thunder rolling, our lips met in perfect unison. His lips were so warm and moist and I could feel his hot breath on my cheek. I wrapped my arms around his neck and his tongue slowly entered my mouth. It was pure bliss.

It was my very first French kiss and I think it was the perfect one.